Physically, I've been doing very well even though I haven't been hitting the gym as much as wanted to. I've been eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner pretty consistently with good balance of nutrients on the food pyramid. I feel like I'm getting bigger physically- upper body and my belly (which I'm trying to prevent). I walk a lot more because of my classes and living on campus. My body uses more energy to keep itself warm since its so ridiculously cold sometimes. But overall, I'm doing well physically.
Mentally, I'm starting to finally get myself to really concentrate and study for my studies. It was really difficult at first to get into this student mode again because I've been out of school for about a year and half. But I'm really starting to pick it up again, which is actually an answer to one of my prayer request. Thank you, Lord! But there are other worries in life that come up to distract me from my studies at times. God has been giving me discernment to distinguish what's from God and what's not from God. Whatever is NOT from the Lord, I rebuke it and pray against it because the enemy always wants to feed our heads with lies and worries.
Emotionally, I could be doing better. I've been having a hard time adjusting here and finding a source of true comfort here. I got plugged into a small group at the church I attend and I've met some really awesome people, but the truth is that I miss my friends and family back at home. Just being with my close ones to be myself and laugh and share and say anything without worrying about being judged and having a good time. But I think this is part of God's plan of making me into a greater man of God. He's constantly reminding me to stop depending on my old comforts, but to take steps of faith into better and bigger things He has for me.
Spiritually, God is amazing. He's been continually been so gracious and loving to me in so many areas of my life. Always providing what I need here and speaking to me everywhere I go. I see God's love and signs and movement constantly in my life, and I pray that He would continue to deepen my intimacy with Him. He's been really good to me. Really. And I realized that it all started with something SO simple that we all know and heard about- our daily devotional time with Him. I've been getting so deeply rooted in the Word lately and it's amazing how God has been speaking to me through the Word. There are times when I just cannot believe what I just read and how He spoke to me. I literally just stop reading and find myself in complete speechlessness and in awe of Him. And then I gladly go on my knees to pray. I give Him all the glory and honor and praise and worship that He deserves, first before anything. Then I pray for the other things. But it's not anything elegant or graceful, but what's real in my heart and mind, as if I'm talking with a close friend (with more reverence of course haha). And then I sit there and listen. Sometimes He gives me a picture of a person, thing, or location. Sometimes I see a word in my head. Sometimes, I don't hear or see anything, but those are the times when my faith is stretched to the fullest because I still believe that He's right there listening to me.
Lord, there is not enough words that I can speak to describe how great and amazing You are. Thank you for being so faithful to me, when I was so faithless. Thank you for your grace and love. I ask that you would continue to grant me a greater understanding of how deep, wide, and long Your love is because it's beyond our knowledge and control. It's something you can only give us. Continue to strengthen my inner man so that I may live for You and You alone, not men. I love you God. I really do. Break me. Mold me. Use me. I pray all these things in Jesus name, Amen.
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